Anxiety Attack
I woke up this day a bit confused on what attitude will I show. I want to be the fast person I was but something at the back of my mind telling me not to. I tried being the slow poke of my being but the fast person idealism striked me hard to be fast. I was in a dilemma of 2 personalities and I want to have a solution to this. I had a haircut on 11:00am and while sitting on the barber’s chair, I felt moderate anxiety which I tried to relieve at that point. I failed hto relieve my anxiety and my facial appearance reflected my anxiety. I look really bad after the haircut. My head started to burn. I went home very anxious and ready to exert every anxiety I had this morning. I do not even know why I was anxious that time to start with which put a pressure to find the best solution. I took a bath at 12 noon and I was still very anxious. I ate lunch and I felt I was full in 2 cups of rice already which was not the case every meal.
At 1pm, I find serenity. I was toned down. I had a comfortable time spending the afternoon with a calm personality/ mood. I was doing great on my schedule. I had a head ache at 5pm. I tried deep breathing exercises as well as drinking plenty of water. I was relieved of the pain at 6:30pm. I cleaned my face after stabilizing my mood. I noticed I had another pimple close to the eye. I was in disbelief. Can it be the stress caused the appearnce of pimples? I guess yes. I had been stressful in the morning and the pimple appeared when the stress/ anxiety subsided. I typed this post today because it will serve another thing to remind me of how I can be weak and when I can gain the strength to stabilize again emotionally.
I had the ups and downs of emotional feelings. I cannot deny the evidences pointing to a “Bipolar disorder.” I can be depressed and manic at separate times within the day. I hate it. It won’t consume my healthy being. God, help me!
