The Diary of a Young Man

I learned to follow my heart and disobey what my mind tells me. I fall from my decisions and gain knowledge from my faults. I lied to the person I love most and I hurt him. I become confused and corrected.

"If a picture paints a thousand words but why I can’t paint you"

this is a line taken from the lyrics "if" by Bread. This line seems significant because of its choice of words and logical affirmations. I love that song but it saddens me. I tried to hate it but I failed. I was once a music hater but because of this song I startd to love it. within my heart it has a special part of me. In my soul the meaning lies unchanged.

Pale memories… of the past… fears, agony and desires are just plain. I experienced more from fear and less from love. I hate to hear lies but I had acted one. I cannot be you and not be less me. If perfection comes it leaves me behind. I stared at the sky at that night thinking of my future as myself. I sensed fear if my being cannot be accepted by my superiors. My superiors are not my parents but those who I will serve in later years.

Pale life, my pale blue…

I loved sentimental songs but I hate loud songs. One day, maybe, I will embrace the one that I hate and dethrone my likes within. Let me testify how much it takes to be a man. I am not a weakling nor inferior. I am an average person waiting to discover my ultimate power in this world.

Let me love you till my hourglass will break and my rose will wither.